Marriage Before Love
A man went to his pastor for counseling. In his hands were pages of complaints against his wife. After hours of uninterrupted listening, the pastor couldn’t help but ask, “If she is that bad, why did you marry her?” Immediately the man shot back, “She wasn’t like this at first!” The pastor, unable to hold back his thoughts, asked, “So, are you saying that she is like this because she’s been married to you?”
Dwell With Understanding
My wife, Marlene, and I have been married for some 30 years, and have learned to appreciate each other and enjoy each other’s unique qualities. But even after all these years she still surprises me from time to time. Recently, she reacted to a news report in a way that was opposite to what I expected. I told her, “Wow, that shocks me. I never would have thought you would land there on this issue.” Her response? “Your job is to figure me out, and my job is to keep you guessing!” The responsibility to understand your spouse is what keeps married life interesting and stretching.
For Her
When my wife had dental surgery, she was out of commission for the weekend. While she was recuperating, I had the daunting task of taking care of her and the kids. I cooked, washed dishes, made special trips to the store for her, and bathed the kids. When I saw all I had done, I thought to myself, I deserve extra credit and reciprocal service when she gets better. Before I gave myself too many pats on the back, however, the Holy Spirit reminded me that what I was doing was my privilege and duty as a Christian husband.
There Is Love
Some time ago, I traded e-mail with a friend who was approaching 30 and had no serious love relationship in sight. He’s talented, fun, handsome, and a committed Christian. But so far, everything on his romantic horizon has turned out to be a mirage.
Avoiding The Greener Grass
Nancy Anderson says she grew lukewarm in her faith and thus believed the world’s lie: “I deserve to be happy.” This led to an extramarital affair that nearly ended her marriage. She wrote her book Avoiding The Greener Grass Syndrome to help keep her painful story of infidelity from “becoming someone else’s story.”
Love Never Fails
Poet Archibald MacLeish says that “love, like light, grows dearer towards the dark.” This is what he calls the “late, last wisdom of the afternoon.” The same is true of our love for one another; it can indeed grow dearer as we age. I have seen it myself in two elderly friends.
The Miracle Of Marriage
When Pastor Howard Sugden performed the wedding ceremony for my husband and me, he emphasized that we were participating in a miracle. We believed him, but we didn't comprehend the size of the miracle needed to hold two people together, much less become one.
Opening The Door
When my wife and I went out to lunch with some friends, I noticed that the husband went around to the passenger side of the car and opened the door for his wife. I said to him, "Some women might consider that demeaning." "That's right," he said. "One woman saw me do that and remarked, 'I'm sure she's perfectly capable of opening the door for herself!' I told her, 'I don't open the door for my wife because she's incapable. I do it to honor her.'"
Happily Ever After?
Despite what we've heard in countless fairy tales, there's no guarantee that people who get married will live happily ever after. Things go wrong—sometimes terribly wrong. Even with the best of intentions, we may find ourselves in a house full of resentment, hostility, unrest, and misery. There is no heartache quite like the heartache of an unhappy marriage.
